I really really know how it is to get affected by others decisions. But I have gotten a new understanding of it. Today after the Pastor at Lighthouse made the announcement that my family was leaving, people lined up to give us hugs and to say goodbye. I almost cried, once. We have been living with the decision for a while, but to see it from others eyes, it was very defferent. I saw someone standing in one of the first couple of rows crying. Another lady came through and said she remembered when my parents met, and they have been married 20 years. I gave Margi a very tight squeeze. All lot of people said we would be missed. I got a lot of hugs today. I will miss a lot of things...and a lot of people. When Pastor Terry was praying for us, the things he said made me realize that it is ok for me not to be there right now, because what we do is not appreciated. When he was praying, he would say, this couple. It was a family decision, he didn't even want to know why we needed to leave. He was saying some things that we were "known for" in the church. All he could say about Nathan and I was our involvement on the worship team. For years we have been working in ministries at that church. Since Brent and Chris were there, Nathan and I helped in Children's church. Now, at Lighthouse, we are not given the freedom to help, the freedom to get up and lay hands on someone, and I am not being given the freedom to teach. I want to teach God's Word, and I had hoped I would be able to get more experience in doing what I love in that church were I have been my entire life. But I am not. Now my family will try to find another church, and I can't just automaticaly be involed in ministry. I don't mean to be bitter. If I sound bitter, I am sorry. the things going on just sadden me.
I will get on to another subject. At school, me and three other girls are doing a weekly bible study. I have been failing in that area and 2 of the girls are trying to make changes in their lives. I just think that this is an awesome thing. And I hope this bible study will give us all a chance to be accountable. I am excited, we don't get any spiritual feeding at school, even though the teachers try, they just don't get through to us. I am hoping with this Bible study that we will be able to have discusions about things going on and that we will pray for one another. I really am excited about this. Please keep me and these girls in prayer.
I need to go to bed now, I was like falling asleep at 5 today lol.
