God, what is this?
Yeah so yesterday was my best friends wedding. It was beautiful. They released butterflies. My friend looked so gorgumous. Of course, she is always beautiful, but yesterday she outdid herself.
The person with whom I ended a friendship was there. I knew she was going to be. I just didn't know how to deal with the situation. I saw her arrive and i just sorta tried not to look in her direction, cuz I didn't want our eyes to meet cuz i didn't know what to say or do. The thing was, when we went inside after the ceremony, the lady was directly in my view. It drove me insane because it hurt me to see her every single time. I was grateful when someone else came over to stand at our table. I felt really bad cuz the lady's mom was there and I didn't want her mom to be hurt cuz I wasn't saying hi. I went kinda close to where the lady was and I was talking to my aunt and uncle. She passed by and tapped my arm and said hi. I completely tensed, and I think my uncle saw the pain in my face because he looked at me kinda funny. I just didn't know what to do. What the heck do you do in those situations? Anyway, I decided to go over to her table and say hi because i didn't get to say it, and i felt really bad about it. I went over and i said hi and she reached out for a a hug, then she said the she wanted to reconcile because she misses me. She had tears in her eyes. That drove me nuts for the rest of the day. I was sitting with linette and Ms. D (friend of the family) and they could tell when I was thinking and they told me to stop. Near the end of the reception, i saw the lady walking somewhere alone. It was the first time she had been alone all day, so I went up to her. She said she had been fine with things until she saw me again at the wedding. I am not sure how that makes me feel. My cousin almost said the exact thing when I was leaving her place, she said, I didn't realize how much I missed you, until i saw you. I really don't know how to feel about that statement. anyway, the lady asked me if I was open. I can't believe she expected an answer then. I told her we needed to discuss it, and i told her to call me. She said well, how about you e-mail me. I told her no. She asked me why not and I said no. She looked at me and said, it left a bad taste in your mouth didnt it. To that I said yes. I was so cold with her. I hate being like that. I don't know what to say when we discuss it. I don't know what my decision will be. Right now, I am just struggling.
The person with whom I ended a friendship was there. I knew she was going to be. I just didn't know how to deal with the situation. I saw her arrive and i just sorta tried not to look in her direction, cuz I didn't want our eyes to meet cuz i didn't know what to say or do. The thing was, when we went inside after the ceremony, the lady was directly in my view. It drove me insane because it hurt me to see her every single time. I was grateful when someone else came over to stand at our table. I felt really bad cuz the lady's mom was there and I didn't want her mom to be hurt cuz I wasn't saying hi. I went kinda close to where the lady was and I was talking to my aunt and uncle. She passed by and tapped my arm and said hi. I completely tensed, and I think my uncle saw the pain in my face because he looked at me kinda funny. I just didn't know what to do. What the heck do you do in those situations? Anyway, I decided to go over to her table and say hi because i didn't get to say it, and i felt really bad about it. I went over and i said hi and she reached out for a a hug, then she said the she wanted to reconcile because she misses me. She had tears in her eyes. That drove me nuts for the rest of the day. I was sitting with linette and Ms. D (friend of the family) and they could tell when I was thinking and they told me to stop. Near the end of the reception, i saw the lady walking somewhere alone. It was the first time she had been alone all day, so I went up to her. She said she had been fine with things until she saw me again at the wedding. I am not sure how that makes me feel. My cousin almost said the exact thing when I was leaving her place, she said, I didn't realize how much I missed you, until i saw you. I really don't know how to feel about that statement. anyway, the lady asked me if I was open. I can't believe she expected an answer then. I told her we needed to discuss it, and i told her to call me. She said well, how about you e-mail me. I told her no. She asked me why not and I said no. She looked at me and said, it left a bad taste in your mouth didnt it. To that I said yes. I was so cold with her. I hate being like that. I don't know what to say when we discuss it. I don't know what my decision will be. Right now, I am just struggling.
posted by Bee at
9:02 AM
1 Comments:
I'm not sure I know what your exact situation is but I do know this....
You need to make a chioce you need to deside weather or not that frienship is worth saving. You need to pray about it and you need to be willing to do whatever it is that GOD tells you to. You definately need to forgive. Harboring bitterness has never brought about anything good for anyone. And most of all you need to love with the love of CHRIST regaurdless of how much it hurts. I know not all of these things are easy to do but, in time you will find the strength and the courage to do them all! I love you and I trust that you will make a good choice!
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home