O my word.

Before a thunderstorm came about and I was forced to shut off the computer I was about to say ......"I can feel the bile rising in my throat. I can feel the devil messing with my life. I can feel him laughing at me." Ok. Now. God is awesome. First let me explain. Lately I have feeling like crap because I have been going through a lot of crap. And a lot of crap. A lot of it had to do with the fact that I didn't feel like my relationship with Christ was what it was supposed to be. And it isn't. And because of all the stuff I have been going through, i have just wanted to go away somewhere away from people I know and be able to think and pray, alone. Then I was thinking that I couldn't wait until the revolve tour. That's when God worked in me. He just put on my heart the women who preach and minister to girls. I don't want to go into a secular profession. I realized that it was my flesh that was making me want to go to PBA and do music for the rest of my life. That is my problem. I haven't been looking to God for direction. I have been looking within me. Anyway, I felt like crying at first because I think I have known for a while that God didn't want me to sing for the rest of my life as a profession. I was upsetting because this has been what I wanted to do my whole life. But it isn't what God wants me to do. I feel God leading into ministry. I want to be a help to young girls who don't know what the heck is going on and i want to tell them that it's all right. God is never going to leave u. I don't know details yet and I want to talk with my pastor but, I want to be Gods vessel. I want to be the car that He is driving and I want the whole world to know that God is great. GOD IS GREAT!! I fi have to stay up all night and pray and read my Bible and pray and read my Bible, I will. I want everyone who reads this post to hold me to this. I want to be God's. All i needed to do was listen. Listen. God may be trying to tell u something. O my word. God is incredible. NO MORE SATAN. I am done having u rule my descisions. GOD IS MY LIFE.